Three-quarters of a million pounds is a lot of money. On an average UK wage, it would take someone about 24 years to earn that much money. It would take the Prime Minister about three years. That much money would buy you nine homes in Burnley. Or one Phil Bardsley from Stoke City. And while Phil may be the kind of player to cover 44 acres every game for the Clarets, he certainly doesn't come with 44 acres. This Grade II-listed farmhouse, however, does.
A four-bedroom property boasting the kind of space which farmers need both outside and inside (geographically, not emotionally - although who am I to say?), this classic detached farmhouse with nicer views than most skyscrapers may cost as much as a 31-year-old right-back, but is a veritable steal when you realise just how much space 44 acres is.
Sticking with the sporting theme, it's the equivalent of about 33 football pitches. And I'm not taking your local five-a-side, I'm talking Turf Moor, the Camp Nou, Wembley. That £710,000 - £750,000 asking price is looking a little more tempting.
With the kind of multi-faceted exterior of most farmhouses (all of which have developed new bits as they've grown over time), the home is roomy and well-proportioned, rustic yet cheerfully modern in its own stylish way. It's the kind of building which is just nice to look at; it could be a church, it could be a mill: it is a very nice place to call home.
Inside, deep-coloured beams streak across the ceilings and mullion windows offer peaks outside across stretched views of all that land you now own. Smart enough to have the guaranteed cosy-level booster of fireplaces almost throughout the house, this is one farmhouse which is going to stick to the archetype of warm atmospherics, rich gravy hotpot bubbling away on the stove, sheepdog sleeping by the Aga.
A house made to be welcoming in the winter and light in the summer is a rare thing, but this is one of them. And it has character. All the rooms are unlike the last apart from the fact that they are all large and look like they'd make lovely places in which to curl up.
Also, it's hard not to emphasise the reality of this house literally coming with another house in the deal (provided we all take stables to be de facto horse houses, which they emphatically are, don't @ me). The seven stables, hay loft, and machinery store are sure to meet any exacting equestrian standards you have, I'm sure.
This house is just very nice. It's solid and friendly, like an architectural version of Robbie Coltrane. And, after all, what more could one want?
For more information, head to https://www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/details/46745261?search_identifier=11d8414d3edc22258fc0f145bbc01683